Life with JJ

The Times They Are A Changing - January 20th

2011-01-20T13:36:00.011-06:00

Has it really been almost 7 months since my last post? Do I really have a 2 1/2 year old and a 6 1/2 month old? Did we really make the move to Vermont?

The answer to all of these questions, obviously, is "yes." It's hard to find the time to write a new blog entry with everything I have going on here as a stay-at-home mom of two. But one of my New Year's resolutions was to bring this blog back to life and I'm really going to try to update it at least once in a while. I've also created a blog specifically devoted to Elka, so this blog will hopefully still focus mostly on JJ. But I'm making no promises that the two won't merge into one someday.

So, to stay on track, JJ is really growing up. He started talking -- I mean, REALLY talking in sentences -- back in winter of 2009 and his verbal ability is really off the charts now. I am honestly amazed at how well he speaks, not just due to his pronunciation, but also the way that he puts sentences together. He's had lots of classic quotes which I should have written down, but of course I didn't. It's amazing how much more time it takes to care for two children versus one...

Today brought the birth of yet another JJ classic quote. He was looking at the project book that came with the Citiblocks he got for Christmas, and he pointed to one partiular structure and said, "Momma, build this and it will change your life." I thought that was pretty hilarious and didn't realize until later that he got that phrase, "change your life," from a Paul Bunyan book we have. In it the story explains that Paul Bunyan receives a double-bladed axe as a Christmas gift and that the gift, "will change his life." JJ asked me to read the book to him before his nap today and when I got to that page, I put 2 and 2 together. So after his nap he convinced me to build it, pictured here. He also told me that, upon completion of the structure, I would receive a "special treat" in the form of a glow-in-the-dark star. Also pictured here. The he proceeded to add his own touches to it, and then he knocked it down. Good stuff.

As evidenced in the above story, these days JJ is in the habit of memorizing things. He memorizes books, like "Hop on Pop," "The Cat in the Hat," "The Cat in the Hat Comes Back," and other Dr. Seuss books. It started when Jeremy had JJ on the potty and was reading "Hop on Pop" to him. We happen to have two copies of the book, so Jeremy was reading one and JJ had the other. Jeremy started a sentence and JJ finished it. But that's not all. He went on to finish the the ENTIRE book. We couldn't believe it! We discovered over time that he had memorized several of his books and he was able to read each of them with only the occasional reminder from us on how the story continued. Usually the first two words of the sentence would jog his memory. Over the holiday season we were astonished to realize that he had memorized the entire "Twas the Night Before Christmas" poem, or story, or... whatever you call it.

He also memorizes songs very quickly and accurately. And when I say "accurately" I mean the tune of the song as well as the words. Some of his favorites are "The Goldfish," and "We are the Dinosaurs," by Laurie Berkner, and just about any nursery rhyme song you can think of, like "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star," "Old MacDonald Had a Farm," or "Baa Baa Black Sheep." We recently signed him up for a Kindermusik class and he's loving it. They sing songs and dance in the class, and each child is given a CD of music to take home. JJ knows almost every song now, and on week two of the class he was the only kid to sing every song. Granted he is one of the older kids in the class, but I really think he has a gift for memorization.

JJ is doing great as a big brother. Elka LOVES him and smiles whenever he pay the slightest attention to her. He often goes up to her and says "I love you, Elka," and plants a kiss on her forehead without any prompting from Jeremy or me. He does get a little possessive of his toys around her, but we're working on it. Once we step in and explain to him that he has to share his toys with his sister, he's pretty understanding and compliant. All in all, it's going pretty well.

New Big Brother, but Still My Baby...

2010-07-07T14:08:00.007-05:00

There is so much to write about the last year or so and I feel terrible that I let this blog go for so long. But now there are more pressing things on my mind because JJ became a big brother this past weekend. So the last year's events will have to wait for a later post.

I'm very happy that we have Elka, our new addition to the family, but this post isn't about her. It's about JJ. My sweet, sweet JJ. Everyone says that these transitions are harder for us than they are for our children, but how does anyone know that for sure? I think this has to be an incredibly hard time for JJ, and he's doing a great job of covering it up, but it shows through now and then, and I feel sad for my little boy.

Since Elka got here JJ has seemed to be taking it all in stride. He was quiet at first, not really knowing what to make of the baby, and then he was more interested, asking questions, making observations, "oh, the baby's sleepin'!" and the like. I've been spending almost all of my time with Elka, nursing her, holding her, taking care of her and resting so that I can recover from the birth. JJ has been downstairs or outside with Jeremy and with his Uncle Matt, who is staying with us to help out during this time of change. Everything seems to be fine, but today something happened that makes me realize that JJ has a lot of feelings about this new addition to our family, and I'm not sure he knows how to process it or how to express himself about it.

I had been upstairs for most of the day, and when I came down, JJ was in his high chair eating lunch. Jeremy was putting something together for me to eat, and I looked at JJ. As soon as he saw me look at him he said, "No, Momma go away!" He kept insisting that I leave, telling me to go away, go THAT way (pointing in the direction from which I had come) and so forth. Jeremy and I told him that it wasn't nice to tell Momma to go away and that he should stop saying it. This eventually turned into a full-blown tantrum and crying fit on JJ's part, and while I know it was probably just his way of having some control over things during a chaotic time for him, it was hard not to take personally what he was saying to me.

I decided to let my lunch sit for a while and put JJ down for his nap myself, like I did every day before Elka was born. Once I had him in my arms (I know, I shouldn't be lifting him yet) he cuddled me and played with my hair they way I've been yearning for these last few days. We laid down in his bed and he played with my hair more playfully, throwing it in my face so that I would blow it away from my face, and we both laughed until I started to cry. Not happy, laughing tears, but just emotional tears. I've been missing times like these with JJ and while I know that there are plenty more to be had once we all adjust to being a family of four, it saddens me to know that both JJ and I have been deprived of our normal relationship lately. Once I started reading to him, as is our nap-time routine, he tangled his hand up in my hair, his little arm nestled under my neck, and smooshed his face against mine, and he was smiling. We were back together, and we were both so happy about it.

I read to him until he fell asleep, which I don't usually do, and once he was finally asleep I sat and looked at him for a long while. He looks like a giant -- his big face starting to lose the "baby look"; his long, muscular legs; his thick, bushy hair (at least, compared to Elka's). He's really not a baby anymore and I can't help but wonder where all the time has gone. And where did the last nine months go? The last nine months which were my last chance to give him my undivided attention and love, when we could do whatever we wanted to do together, whenever we wanted. When I could sit on the couch and read him book after book after book. Now he tells me to "go away," and I'm starting to understand why.

It's not that he really doesn't want me around. In fact I believe it's the complete opposite. But he knows I'm not going to be around as much as I was and he's trying to compensate for his lack of control of the situation. I know that all of this will get better and easier for all of us. I know that I've got a ridiculous amount of hormones coursing through my body right now and that I'm extremely emotional and sensitive. I know that very soon JJ is going to love Elka as much as I do. And I know that he's going to be a terrific big brother and that he will be happy to not be an only child. But right now I don't think that we can say, "this is harder on you than it is on him," because I think this is equally hard on both of us. Since the day he was born he's been the center of my universe, and while it would be more accurate to say that there are now two suns in my universe rather than to say that JJ has been consumed by a new one, things are going to change. He's going to have to adjust to a new life that requires him to share his parents, his time, his home. You you can't tell me that isn't hard for a little boy.

Both JJ and Elka are napping right now and while I know that is any new mother's dream, I hope it doesn't work like that all the time. I want to make sure that JJ and I have our alone time once in a while, not to mention that Elka deserves some one-on-one time, too. I'm already longing for the times past when we had no plans, no schedule, and nothing defining our day except for our love and our whims. Even though I'm sure our new life will be just as rewarding and full of love and experience as our old life was, it's hard to let go of that time we will never get back.

Adventures in Babysitting - July 31st

2009-07-31T13:47:00.007-05:00

Last week I had the opportunity to watch a good friend's daughter for a few hours in the afternoon/evening at our house. Naturally I jumped on the opportunity, partly in order to help my friend as she has helped me in the past, and partly because I knew that JJ would enjoy the company, but mostly just to see what it would be like to have two little ones in the house, and whether or not I could handle it. Ellia is 10 1/2 months old, so when we have another child it will be impossible for JJ and the baby will be that close in age, but it was good practice anyway. Ellia also has a harder time, in general, being away from her mom. But she's been to our house many times before and she's familiar with both JJ and myself, so I had a good feeling about how things would go.

When Mara dropped Ellia off, she stuck around for a bit, to get Ellia settled. That seemed to work wonders, because once Mara left, Ellia didn't cry one bit. I was very happy and impressed, and while I can't deny that I was sort of proud of myself for this, I know that I had very little to do with it. I was just very happy that Ellia was comfortable in my care. JJ was asleep for the first hour or so of Ellia's visit with us, so that was pretty easy on me. We played for a while and it was refreshing having a little girl around for once. Once JJ woke up, the real fun started.

I didn't want to leave Ellia alone downstairs, so I carried her upstairs with me to get JJ. When JJ saw me walk in the door to his bedroom with another baby in my arms he practically crawled out of the crib -- literally! In fact, if his legs were a little longer or if I hadn't just recently lowered the crib mattress, he WOULD have climbed out. He started whining and crying a little bit, jealous that another cute little baby had made her way into my arms. He wanted his mommy, and he wanted her all to himself. I decided that a diaper change in the midst of all this jealousy would be near impossible, especially since JJ has been really bad for diaper changes in general lately. And I considered putting Ellia in the crib for a few minutes so I could cuddle with JJ, but I knew that would probaby start her crying and I didn't want to ruin the positive trend we had going so far. So I reached into the crib with my free [right] arm and slid JJ onto my right hip, with Ellia still on my left. I carried the two of them down the stairs, into the living room, and then stood there, thinking, "now what?"

I considered putting them down, but with both arms occupied there was really no safe way to do that. So I very carefully lowered myself to the floor and sat with both kids still on my hips. At this point, I could safely put them on the floor, but every time I made any sort of move at all, JJ clung tighter to me, indicating that he did not want to be put down. Again I considered releasing Ellia, but I was nervous that she would cry at seeing me hold JJ, and regardless of what her reaction would have been, I needed a free hand to put either of them down. So we sat there, the three of us, JJ resting his chubby cheek on my right shoulder and Ellia cuddled in my left arm, for about ten minutes. Finally JJ lifted his head up and pulled away from me, ready to brave the living room on his own, and he started playing with some toys. I finally let Ellia go as well and the two of them had a blast playing together.

The rest of the evening went well, and Ellia only got a little bit fussy when Jeremy came home, because she was unfamiliar with him. But soon enough she got used to his presence and we all enjoyed eating together. So now I have renewed confidence that I can handle two. I know it was only one day, and only a few hours at that. And I know that there will be difficult days once we have two children in the house, but it was a good experience to have the two of them here, and honestly, it was easier than I thought. Plus it made me feel pretty good that JJ was so jealous of Ellia over me, despite the fact that it worries me how he will react with a little sibiling in the house someday.

Secret Passage - July 15th

2009-07-15T12:42:00.005-05:00

This has been a really great week so far, and since we're already at Wednesday night I'm willing to wager that the positive trend is going to continue for the rest of the week. On Monday JJ and I went to Cool Waters, the public pool and mini water park here in Greenfield, just down the street a few miles. We met with my friend Erin and her 6-month old Riley. JJ had a blast walking into and out of the water over and over and over again. He was quite a handful, since he just wanted to walk everywhere and didn't want to hold my hand at all (dangerous when we're wading in water up to his waist). He was a little apprehensive of the big waterfalls in the pool because they were so loud, but otherwise he did really well. I think that next year will be even better.

On Tuesday I went to the gym and left JJ in the capable hands of the Kid's Clubhouse caregivers at the WAC. I finished my workout and returned to pick him up and saw him sitting at the table for snack time, eating some Goldfish snacks and looking quite content. Then he turned around and saw me and instantly started full-fledged crying: sobs, tears and all. One of the women brought him over to me and when I asked how he did the rest of the time he was there she informed me that he would have little two-minute crying fits and then they would distract him with a toy or a book and he'd be fine for a while. So he was on-and-off, which isn't terrible, since he was able to calm himself down without the need for the ladies to have me paged. But he's been really clingly lately and I think that's why he had such a hard time. I'm really hoping that he improves because I hate the fact that he has a hard time at all when I'm not with him.

In other news, JJ did something really cute yesterday. Our kitchen, dining room and living room are arranged all in a row, opening into each other. I have a gate sectioning off the kitchen from the other two rooms so that JJ is confined to a safe area where he can do whatever he wants with his toys and I can still keep an eye on him from the kitchen. Between the dining room and kitchen there is a row of cabinets with a countertop above and JJ loves to play with the cabinets, opening and closing the doors and pulling out some placemats and cloth napkins I have down there. Normally they're full of pots and pans that are too heavy for JJ to lift, but last night I was using the big pot that takes up most of the end cupboard and JJ decided to take advantage of that. While I was busy making dinner I heard the normal sounds he usually makes -- babbling to himself and opening and closing cabinet doors in the dining room. Then I heard something I don't usually hear when he's playing like that in the dining room: tiny footsteps just behind me. I turned around to see what was happening, and there was JJ, in the kitchen with me. He had taken all of the placemats and napkins out of the end cupboard, crawled through the cabinet, and opened the door to enter the kitchen since the big pot that usually blocks the way was gone. He created his own little secret passage. Pretty cute. I grabbed the camera and snapped a shot of the proud JJ just after he came through. then I convinced him to go back where he came from, through the cabinet, and I got a couple of shots of that, too.

Tomorrow it's back to the gym, so we'll see how that goes. And on Friday we'll be going to the Betty Brinn Children's Museum downtown with a couple of friends and their kids. I'm pretty excited because I've been waiting for JJ to be old enough to enjoy something like this, and I think he's right at that age where he can start to do that. I would love to bring my camera to take some pictures but I'm not sure if they allow photos to be taken, not to mention that the only camera I have access to right now is pretty big and cumbersome, and not something I want to have to lug while I'm chasing JJ around the museum. So when I get to writing about our trip, my words will have to suffice.

It's Been a While... - July 10th

2009-07-10T14:54:00.012-05:00

OK, so some people have been on me to update this blog (you know who you are) and while I've been very busy and feel like I never have time to do it I agree that it's about time. In fact I'm disappointed myself because now I don't have a nice blog from the last few months to look back on, and I feel sad that my little guy is getting so big too fast. In any case, I'm going to try to make up for it and keep updating this with more devotion than I have done previously, but we'll see how it goes.

So let's see -- what's new? Well, since the last post which was way back in November (!) quite a bit has happened. JJ traveled with Mom and Dad to Virginia to see Grandma and Grandpa Hohner for Christmas, and he got to meet Uncle Eric, Aunt Lucy, Uncle Fred, Aunt Andi, as well as his Hansen 2nd cousins. He was extremely well-behaved on the airplane as usual and impressed all of our fellow-passsengers who I'm sure were expecting him to cry the whole time.

It was the day we were traveling on the plane to Virginia that JJ went from hands and knees to sitting up for the first time. We were sitting in the airport, delayed, and JJ was playing on a blanket we brought along. He had been going on his hands and knees for quite some time, rocking back and forth and I couldn't figure out why he always went up into a downward-facing-dog kind of yoga position, but when he lowered himself to sitting from that position for the first time, I understood what he had been working on all that time. Then, after we got to Virginia, on the day before Christmas Eve JJ had another first -- he crawled for the first time! Grandma and Grandpa were very happy to get to witness this miletone. He was slow at first, but by the time we got home from our Christmas trip, he was becoming an expert.

Since then so much has happened. JJ is walking all the time now. He took his first steps at about 9 1/2 months but then didn't do too much more of it for a while. I was at work the evening he took his first steps, and when Jeremy told me on the phone that he had just done it, I begged him to take some video and post it on Facebook so I could log in and see it right away. Ahh, the beauty of modern technology. So even though I didn't get to witness it myself, at least I got to see it moments later.

JJ had his first birthday party on June 6th. Unfortunately it was cool and rainy so we had to have the party inside. Since our house isn't very big that made for a, shall we say "cozy" experience with the guests. But everyone seemed to enjoy themselves. JJ had fun making a mess with his birthday cake, but didn't really seem to enjoy eating it all that much. I guess he's just got healthier eating habits! JJ got lots of wonderful gifts from his friends. I'm still working on the thank-you cards; we'll see if they ever get done...

Now that he's 13 months he's been walking almost exclusively for the past two months or so, although he does enjoy crawling from time to time. He's also babbling non-stop, and I'm amazed at the complexity of his baby babble. He uses every diphthong and consonant combination known to man (except for those that constitute English), and if you didn't know better you'd swear he was speaking a real language -- just one you don't understand. He says "Momma" and "Dada," and he can almost say "cat" and "dog." I think he's really close to starting to talk for real, but so far it's mostly just babble.

His latest trick, which I think is pretty neat, is pointing to things. He will point at something in front of him or across the room if he wants it, but he also points to pictures of things he recognizes. If we're reading a book and there is a cat in a picture I'll say, "where's the cat, JJ?" And he'll point to the cat. The first time I did that I thought it was just a coincidence, so I tried with a couple of different pictures that included cats, and he always pointed to the correct animal. He can also point to a picture of a dog, an apple, a ball, and a duck. The ball really impressed me, too. We have a book called "I'll Teach My Dog a Lot of Words" and in it it has a picture of a dog catching a little red ball. I asked JJ to point to the ball, and he did! I was impressed, but then again, he's my son so just about everything he does impresses me.

Also, JJ did what I asked him for the first time yesterday. He was standing near a book that was on the floor, pointing to it and I said, "Do you want Momma to read the book to you? Bring the book to Momma and I'll read it to you." And he looked at me, and then looked at the book and then back at me, and he brought the book over to me. I was surprised, because I wasn't actually expecting him to do it. He's done similar things several times now. It's like he's becoming a REAL person!

In other news, I quit my job back in June so I could be home with JJ full-time. We're still adjusing but so far it's been nice to be able to play with him in the mornings instead of rushing around to get myself and JJ ready to go for the day. We're still working on getting into a nice, productive routine, but that's ok. We'll get there.

That's all for now... I will add pictures when I have time!

Sweet Potato and Cutie Pie! - November 20th

2008-11-20T15:48:00.005-06:00

After a week of bananas, JJ was ready to move on to something else, and got his first taste of sweet potatoes! And he LOVED them! He gobbled them up like it was nobody's business, and looked adorable while he did it! I know it looks like he got more on his face and bib that in his tummy, but really he ate a lot. In fact, he finished the whole jar, which he never did with bananas. Every time I brought the spoon up from the bowl, he would lunge forward with his face and arms, ready for more, so I'm guessing he liked it.

Today was a little challenging since JJ didn't want to take any naps. He took one short nap for about 40 minutes this morning, and then refused to go down in the afternoon. I finally got him to fall asleep around 3:30pm which is kind of the last chance for a nap for him, or else we run the risk of him being down for the entire night. But he was up less than an hour later. So I spent some time today taking pictures of him. Oh, by the way, in case anyone is wondering, we're borrowing a camera right now, and it's the same model I'm thinking about buying, so that's why there are pictures to be seen at all right now.

So, here's an update on what JJ's been doing lately. A few weeks ago he rolled over for the first time. He started doing it non-stop, rolling from his front to his back and his back to his front, scooting all over the place. But for some reason he hasn't rolled over for almost two weeks now. I saw him do it once yesterday, but otherwise I've noticed that he hasn't been doing it. I'm not sure why. I don't think he realizes that if he's on his back and wants to be on his front, he can do that himself. I think the novelty of being able to roll over has gotten old and now he'll just whine if he's in a position he doesn't like. I've left him whining many times, thinking that he will eventually realize that he can fix his own problem, but it doesn't seem to be getting through. I even pushed him a little bit so that he would almost roll over, trying to remind him of his new skill, but he just doesn't seem interested in rolling over anymore. Oh well.

Aside from that, he is a master-pivoter, changing directions with ease while he's on his belly. He loves to hold and study things, and of course, he loves to chew. I really think he's going to cut a tooth soon, but there's still no visible sign of any teeth coming, aside from his constant teething. He loves to laugh and it's a lot of fun when Jeremy and I really get him going. He's sleeping 12 hours straight through the night, which is a very welcome development, and overall he's just the cutest thing (if I do say so myself).

November? Really?? - November 3rd

2008-11-13T11:26:00.015-06:00

JJ and I awoke on Monday, November 3rd to find a beautiful, 70 degree day tempting us to take advantage of it. We started with JJ playing on the floor in the living room as he often does, but because it was so nice and warm out, I was able to keep the front door open, bringing in more of the sunshine JJ loves. After a while, I thought to my self, "wait a second -- this is NOVEMBER. In Wisconsin. There aren't going to be many more, if any, days like this in the near future." And with that thought I got JJ and me ready to go out for a nice walk.

There is a scenic trail not far from our house on which I used to take Tommy out for walks. I decided to take JJ there on this beautiful day, sans Tommy mainly because I had just cleaned out my car and wasn't ready to get dog hair all over it again! So JJ and got in the car and rode, windows wide open, to the trail, about a mile from our house.

Once there I immediately decided that this walk would be a good subject for a blog entry, since it was so pretty outside, with the sun shining and the leaves falling off the trees. I had brought the camera along to take pictures and so I decided to start shooting as we walked.

JJ was really enjoying it, as you can see. I took a few shots of him and we journeyed on, taking in the fresh air and gorgeous weather, knowing that it will be many months before we get to enjoy another day outside without having to bundle up. The trees and tall grass were just begging to be photographed, and I was determined to go for a long walk and write a nice, long blog entry about it, complete with pictures.

I really liked the way the sun was shining through the dry, brown grass and thought it would be nice to share here, so I snapped a shot. After that, JJ and I continued to walk, and there was a nice bend in the trail up ahead. Another great opportunity for a good picture, I thought, and pulled out the camera. I'm not sure what happened, but I turned the camera on and then, without any reason at all, I dropped the camera, right on the lens. I don't know how or why -- it just slipped out of my hands. In any case, the camera is busted to the point where I'm no longer able to take pictures with it. So this is probably going to be the last entry for a while, at least the last entry with photos to accompany it. That's not to say I can't post if something interesting should happen, but I really just write this stuff so there's something to read along with the pictures. I never really thought anyone REALLY read all this anyway. So you can continue to check back, but until we get a new camera, it's going to be a little boring. anyway, hope you enjoyed the last "illustrated" post for a while!

Anyway, we finished our walk, which took about an hour, and all the people walking and riding their bicycles on the trail smiled at JJ as they passed by. It was a great day, and a great way to spend it.

What a Month! - October 27th

2008-10-27T14:33:00.030-05:00

For those of you who still actually attempt to read this blog, I apologize for not updating in so long. A lot has happened, so I'll get right to telling you all about it.

First of all, Jeremy lost his job a little over a month ago, which accounts for much of the reason I haven't posted in so long. He's been home with JJ and me, and we've been enjoying some quality family time together, and we've been working hard on the finishing touches for our remodeling project upstairs (I'll have a picture soon of the tiling work Jeremy has done in the bathroom -- not complete yet, but close!). Sure, we did some relaxing mixed in there, but all in all we've been so busy I just didn't get around to writing in a while.

If you're still holding your breath, you can exhale now; Jeremy got a new job and started today. So today is my first time in more than a month alone with the baby all day. I've done it before obviously, but he's changed so much it's a whole different ballgame now. He doesn't sleep nearly as much during the day, leaving me less and less time to do all the household things I need to do (groceries, laundry, cleaning, organizing, cooking, etc) and leaving me almost zero free time to do things like write this blog. Lucking he's napping now, so I decided to sit down and write for a while.

In any case, since the last time I wrote, JJ has learned many new things. He finally found his feet and of course, his favorite part of his feet -- his toes! He loves to grab them and look at them, pull on them, try to put them in his mouth (he hasn't figured that one out just yet, but he's getting there). On one of the days we were hanging out in our bedroom we gave him this blow-up, child-sized beach ball and let him hold it between his legs. He had a good time, and we even got some video of it. Of course, he's always more entertaining just seconds BEFORE I am able to grab the camera and start recording, but at least you can get an idea of what he was doing.

JJ is also getting a lot better at moving around.
He loves being on his tummy now, and he can scoot himself around to face different directions. He even started inching forward recently, and for an infant who can't quite crawl properly yet, he can really get around! He's much more interactive with his toys, which are usually the objects that convince him it's worth inching forward in order to get to them. He likes to hold things in his hands, move them around and study them, and of course, he loves putting just about everything in his mouth!

I guess the biggest recent development is that today, October 27, 2008, JJ successfully rolled over from his back onto his stomach, all by himself. He's been rolling over from his tummy onto his back for a while now, but going the other way is much harder, since it requires more momentum and his chubby little arms get in the way. But after a few failed attempts this morning, he finally figured it out, and rolled all the way onto his tummy, and even managed to pull his arm out and around so that both his arms were sitting in front of him. Grandma Hohner was on the phone with me when it happened, so I kind of have a witness to this, even though she couldn't see it happening. I'll try to get some video of him doing it in the future if I can catch it.

During this past month JJ also had his first plane ride when we took a trip to Virginia together. It was my gift to my mother for her birthday -- Grandma and Grandpa agreed to pay for our plane ticket so they could get another visit with JJ, and my gift to them was traveling (sans Jeremy Sr.) with him. It was a new experience for JJ and for me and it was a bit difficult at times, juggling a 4 month old and all his accoutrements while going through security, sitting on a plane for hours, and carting him around the airport. But we got through it, and JJ was simply amazing. On the way to Virginia he cried for a total of less than a minute -- that's in the airport AND on the planes (there was a connection). He slept through some of the plane ride, but even when he was awake he didn't fuss, despite the ear popping he was probably experiencing. I think it helped that I nursed him on the plane, which I was really nervous about doing because I know that some people are uncomfortable with seeing that in public, especially in the close quarters of an airplane. But nursing or not, he was just incredible!

In Virginia JJ got to spend lots of quality time with Grandma and got to ride with Grandpa on his tractor! He also got to meet Great Aunt Edna and Great Uncle Stanley, who gave him one of his favorite new toys -- his glow worm! Grandma and Grandpa spoiled him with presents and affection, and we all had a great time.

Well, I hear the little man starting to stir now, so I'll have to end this post. Hope you enjoyed it, and hope I made up for lost time with all the pictures and video! Hopefully I'll be posting again soon, so keep checking!

3 Months Old - September 5th

2008-09-07T00:12:00.009-05:00

JJ is three months old already -- I can't believe it! He really is starting to do different things everyday. Now, if I hold a rattle in front of him, he'll reach out and grab it. Just a few weeks ago he didn't even care about the rattle. He's getting a lot closer to sitting up on his own, but it's still a ways off I think. And it looks like his eyes are finally changing color from the blue he was born with. Still not sure what color they're going to end up, but it looks like they're going to be brown or hazel. I was kind of hoping for green, since I love Jeremy's green eyes, and I think JJ needs some more of Jeremy's features. But we'll just have to wait and see...

In other news, we finally put the crib and dresser together and started moving JJ into his new room. He won't be sleeping up there at night until we also move upstairs, since I'd have to go up to feed him at night. It just makes more sense to stick with the current arrangement until we get ourselves moved in to the adjacent master bedroom. But JJ fell asleep in the crib today and I took a picture of his very first nap in the crib. Pretty cute, huh? Thanks to Grandma and Grandpa Hohner for the crib, which was their baby gift (among others). It looks great, it's nice and sturdy, and JJ really loves it!

Booties for JJ - August 26th

2008-08-26T18:40:00.003-05:00

A few months ago, a friend of my mother's gave a pair of booties and a cap that she knit to JJ as a gift. This is actually the first time I put them on him, but they fit just perfect! I love the way he looks in the glider; for some reason he looks SO old! I guess it's because he looks like he's sitting up, which he is, but he's not really supporting himself. He kept slowly falling over after I took each picture and it made me laugh and laugh. He's pretty adorable.

I just can't believe how big he's getting, and how fast it's happening. I took him to the doctor yesterday and they told me that he's in the 75th percentile for his age. He was 13 lbs, 3 oz and 23 1/2 inches long! That's pretty big for a boy who's not even three month old yet! Before we know it, he'll be off to college :(

"Playtime" Starring JJ Hansen - August 20th

2008-08-20T10:04:00.004-05:00

I've been taking some video of JJ with my digital camera and decided to dedicate a post to it. The first one is JJ playing with his new activity mat. I have three videos of this, and in some of the videos he's more active, whereas in another he makes more cute sounds and looks at the camera. I decided to post the latter. Apparently he's a little camera shy because many times he'll be cooing and playing and then as soon as I start taping, his activity and his vocalizations drop dramatically. I don't know how he knows I'm recording, but he seems to.

The other video is JJ laying belly-down on Daddy's legs (calves). He was making really cute sounds so I started recording. Alas, he quieted down a bit after that, but there are a few good sounds from him anyway. Enjoy!

BUMBO - August 16th

2008-08-16T10:23:00.018-05:00

Lately it's been more and more difficult to keep JJ entertained during the day, since he's awake for such long stretches of time. We really don't have any infant toys that he can play with by himself (meaning toys which don't require me sitting there, shaking it in front of his face). So I decided to buy a Bumbo seat for him.

A Bumbo se at is a rubbery sort of chair that babies can sit upright in as soon as their neck muscles are strong enough to support their head. So even though JJ can't sit upright on his own yet, he can sit in the Bumbo seat. I also bought an activity mat while I was at Target, and he seems to like that pretty well. I think he'll get more excited about both of these as he gets bigger/older, but for now it's nice to be able to put him down once in a while and not have to entertain him constantly. Don't get me wrong -- I don't intend on letting toys or TV and movies babysit him all day everyday, but my days with him are anywhere from 12-16 hours long (before Jeremy's home for the day) and I simply can't hold him throughout every one of his waking hours. These things just help when I need a break, not to mention that I think he enjoys the change of scenery and activity.

AND I can use the Bumbo seat and the activity mat together, if I sit him in front of the toys that are attached to the mat. He seemed to like that the most. Of course, eventually he gets bored of both the seat and the mat, but too much time doing any one thing makes him bored.

Farewell to Favre - August 11th

2008-08-11T22:35:00.016-05:00

JJ fell asleep around 4pm and slept through most of the Packers vs. Bengals game. When he finally woke up, he was dismayed to find out that Brett Favre is no longer playing for the Packers. I thought we had mentioned this to him before, but I guess I was mistaken. In any case, he was really looking forward to being born just so he could see Favre play for the Packers and when he found out he was too late, well, you can tell by the photo that he was anything but happy. Like father, like son, I say.

We were all a little spooked by seeing Tony Kornheiser wearing the Jets #4 jersey. It's just WRONG. But it's the way it is. And Rodgers was looking pretty good tonight, although it's hard to judge from just one quarter of play. In any case, JJ, Momma and Daddy are all very sad tonight. But looking at JJ in a silly hat made us all feel a little better. Well, two of us anyway. JJ doesn't really like having to wear silly things just to cheer us up.

Jack Daniels - August 7th

2008-08-07T12:33:00.004-05:00

Well, thanks so much to the anonymous commenter on my last blog entry. We opened a bottle of whiskey and let JJ go at it, and it WORKED! He slept all night. No wonder -- he drank almost the entire bottle. Luckily he left enough for me to have a couple of shots and, well, let's just say that we BOTH slept like babies!

This morning I wanted to take a nap, but JJ was wide awake. We were out of whiskey, but I gave him a beer and that was enough to knock him out. He likes to party.

Two Months Old - August 5th

2008-08-06T09:15:00.006-05:00

JJ is two months old today (well, yesterday, since I'm actually writing this on August 6th)! And it seems to me that he knows it. He's looking and acting a little older. OK, so I've been cooped up in the house most days and maybe I've gone a little batty. But seriously, he really seems older. His hair is starting to fill out a bit, he's smiling, laughing and cooing a lot more lately and he just LOOKS like he's two months old.

Also, on his first night as a two month old he slept SIX hours straight!! Of course I went to bed an hour after him and I couldn't fall back asleep after the six hour stretch, so I didn't get to take advantage of the 8+ hour potential for sleep, but I'm not really complaining. I think my body is so used to short, fragmented sleep that once I get four or five hours, it thinks it's time to wake up. In any case, I read for a while and eventually fell back asleep for another hour or so before JJ was up for the day.

Automatic Sprinkler - July 29th

2008-07-29T20:15:00.007-05:00

You can see from the picture to the right where I got the inspiration for the name of this post -- thanks to Jeremy's sister Niki for the adorable onesie! However the inspiration for the post itself came yesterday.

I was so proud of myself avoiding "the stream" for so long. It's been weeks since JJ managed to "get" me while I changed his diaper. Since the last time it happened I had resolved to be much more aware and alert during each diaper change and my efforts have been quite worthwhile up to this point. The only thing wet lately has been his diaper, which is always quickly replaced with a new, dry diaper and that's the way it should be. But all that changed yesterday.

I went to change JJ's diaper, which was soaked, and as usual I kept an eye on him, wary of the spontaneous stream that has been known to shoot up and hit everything in sight. But things seemed to be under control, and at some point during the diaper change the diaper needs to actually get changed. So after I cleaned him up, I took away the old diaper and slipped the new one under him. And that's when it happened. My little JJ is quite the opportunist, as he took advantage of the half-second he was completely uncovered and emptied his bladder all over me, the dresser, and even himself. So I cleaned him up again and finshed changing the diaper -- successfully this time.

Later in the day I went to change him again, and this time I was prepared. I made sure to pay even closer attention and make sure that everything (and everyone) stayed dry. Well, I was successful to a degree. I got the new diaper on him just fine, but once it was on him, he SOAKED it. No problem. I quickly and efficiently removed the wet diaper, swapped it for a clean one, and closed it up. And then... he soaked it AGAIN! Now, I really don't mind changing diapers at all, despite the fact that I thought I was really going to hate changing every single diaper. It's really not that big of a deal, and it's really not difficult. I've gotten quite used to doing it, since I change so many diapers every day and all night. But when you change three diapers in the course of one diaper-changing session, it gets pretty frustrating. Not to mention that I had no idea a baby could produce that much urine that quickly.

In any case, this time after I changed him, he stayed dry. At least until the next diaper change. So when I needed to pick another onsie for him to wear, this one was a no-brainer. Now if only we can figure out how to hook him up to the lawn and get him to spray clean water...

Cheap Date - July 25th

2008-07-26T16:28:00.002-05:00

Last night I decided to have a beer after I nursed JJ and put him down for the night. They say it takes about an hour to metabolize each alcoholic drink you consume, so as long as I wait the same number of hours as the number of drinks I have before nursing JJ again, my milk should be free and clear of any alcohol. He usually sleeps for about three or four hours after I put him down for the night, so I had a beer. I finished the beer, and decided that I like the buzz I had, so I started another beer. I barely got through half of that second beer and felt like I was trashed. Well, that might be an exaggeration but I definitely felt like I shouldn't finish that second beer. I gave it to Jeremy instead.

The point is, I am offically a cheap date. Give me one beer, I'm buzzed. Give me a second beer and I might pass out before I finish it. But don't worry, it was over three hours from the time I finished my second (half) beer until I nursed JJ again. Tonight I'm going to a friend's house for a get-together and when I asked if I should bring anything, she told me that they only have a couple of bottles of the kind of beer I like (I'm a beer snob), so I might want to bring a six-pack if I want to drink. I laughed to myself, because one beer will certainly be plenty. I'll still bring the six-pack because I hate to show up at a party empty-handed, but they can have the other five.

My Birth Story (illustrated)

2008-07-25T17:21:00.025-05:00

The story of the birth of my son has to begin with the telling of the death of my grandmother, Mom-mom. Mom-mom has always been an especially important person in my life, as grandmothers often are to grandchildren. When I was a child she was always kind and motherly, taking care of me when I was too sick to go to school, not allowing me to get up from the couch for anything other than using the bathroom. One of my favorite memories of Mom-mom was the wonderful food she prepared, especially the chicken soup with little meatballs she made when I was sick and the Eggplant Parmesan she'd make for my birthday. As I got older, I learned to appreciate Mom-mom more as a friend than a grandmother who showers you with gifts at Christmas and pampers you unconditionally. Through the years we had many conversations that made me appreciate her beyond her role as my grandmother, and I realized how truly I loved her, even beyond the inherent love one feels for a family member.

Ever since I graduated college Mom-mom had been asking when I was going to get married and start a family. As the years continued and I entered my late twenties the pressure got greater, as she would tell me that all her friends had great-grandchildren and she wanted them too, so get moving already. No one can marry and start a family for someone else, but it was always in the back of my mind that Mom-mom was getting older and I was taking my time to find the right person and the right time in my life to settle down. I finally found Jeremy and knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, and luckily he felt the same way. We married just a year ago, on May 27th 2007. Our wedding day was, until JJ was born, the best day of my life.
And at 81 years old, Mom-mom was there, all the way from NJ, despite the fact that she hadn't traveled up to that point since the death of her husband (my Pop-pop) in 1995. I am so grateful to have had that time with Mom-mom looking so beautiful and genuinely happy at my wedding. She even said that she would consider flying out again in the future to visit again which really surprised me.

Unfortunately, Mom-mom had some major health problems earlier this year and spent the last few months in the hospital. I was lucky enough to see her when I visited NJ for my baby shower in April, but she didn't look good. We all knew it was only a matter of time before she would pass, but she told us that she wanted to stick around until our son was born in June. I was really hoping she'd be able to meet him in person or at least to know that he had been born safely before she left us for good. But it wasn't to be.

Mom-mom passed on June 1st – just four days before the birth of little Jeremy Jr. His birth, the story of which follows, was a welcome joy in the face of great mourning for my family. I had considered traveling out to NJ for the services, more for my own closure than any sort of feeling of obligation, but decided against it since I was almost 39 weeks pregnant. And it's a good thing I stayed here in Wisconsin – I went into labor the day of Mom-mom's funeral and he was born the following morning. Mom-mom is gone from this world, but I believe she was was with me throughout my labor and delivery. Jeremy and I planted a rose bush in our back yard as a memorial for her (her name was Rose) and a place for me to do my grieving.

I woke up on June 4th after a night of restless sleep full of sporadic contractions. They felt like Braxton Hicks contractions, except they were tinged with what felt like mild menstrual cramps. It crossed my mind that this could be early labor, but really I believed that the Braxton Hicks were just ramping up a bit, or that this was false labor. Jeremy and I lay in bed, having our morning chat as we always do. I told him about a dream I had that night, in which I was at someone's house, waiting in line to go into labor. There was one girl in front of me, Kristy from my Bradley Method class and one girl behind me, my friend Erin Watts. In reality, Kristy had her baby back in February and Erin is about 10 weeks pregnant now, so I suppose we were lined up in the appropriate order. In any case, Jeremy proceeded to tell me about his dream, that the baby was already here and he was filled with a sense of euphoria and fulfillment. Jeremy joked that since we both had dreams about the baby coming, maybe today was the day; I smiled, but commented that I didn't have any bloody show or other indications that labor was imminent. Not to mention that my due date wasn't for another 8 days or so.

After eating breakfast, I went into the bathroom to take a shower. While undressing I noticed some bloody show in my underwear. I called for Jeremy and showed him, as we both laughed at my earlier comment about a lack of labor signs. I took my shower and when I got out, I saw some more blood. I just happened to have an appointment set with my midwife Jan at 11:30am that morning, but I thought I should call her and see what she thought of all this. Jan said to come in as planned, but that if I wanted to come earlier she was available, so I got ready and made my way up to the Well-Rounded Maternity Center in Menomonee Falls. Jan and I had a pretty typical visit, except that she decided to do a vaginal exam to see if that would give us any more information about what was going on. Jan informed me that I was about 1 ½ centimeters dilated and 60% effaced, which surprised me. But, she cautioned me, this didn't necessarily mean I was in labor or that I would go into labor any time soon. I told her about my sporadic contractions, which were still going since the night before, and asked her if I should go to work or not. She told me that I should be able to go to work, as long as I felt ok with it.

I didn't really want to go to work, but not because of the contractions. It was Wednesday and Friday was supposed to be my last day before maternity leave, and I was anxious for my time off. Still, I knew that I should go, since there was really no reason not to go. So I was at work at 1pm, my usual start time. I couldn't really concentrate on anything; I guess deep down I knew something was happening inside of me. After putzing around at work, not really getting anything accomplished, I noticed that those contractions I had been having the previous night and all day were slightly more noticeable and regular. So I sat down at a computer, went to dateandtime.com (the only place I could find a clock with a second hand) and started timing my contractions. There were still pretty far apart, about 5-6 minutes, but they were consistent, and that's what made me wonder if this might be it. I called Jeremy at work and also mentioned the situation to a few co-workers; everyone thought I should go home. They didn't have to twist my arm – at 3pm I was in my car and on my way home, but I still wasn't convinced that the baby was on his way. In fact, I felt apprehensive about leaving work early because I thought I'd feel really stupid the next day when I showed up to work saying it was false labor and there was no baby yet. But, of course, I left anyway.

Once at home I continued to time my contractions, which seemed to be on the same path, now about 4-5 minutes apart. I called my childhood friend Lauren, who is a midwife in NJ and asked her if I was timing the contractions right, whether she thought this might be it, etc, etc. She was a great comfort and help to me – my surrogate midwife. I made a few more phone calls to let some important people know what was going on, and Jeremy came home from work a couple of hours early, which I welcomed but didn't think was entirely necessary since I still wasn't convinced of what was happening. I called Jan and gave her an update on what was going on. She recommended drinking half a beer to see if it would stop the contractions. Not that we necessarily wanted to stop them, but if this was real labor the contractions would not stop and if it was false labor, they would probably slow considerably or stop altogether. So this would give us a better idea of what was really happening. My first Guinness (well, half) in about 10 months was delicious. But it didn't stop the contractions. They slowed down a little, to every 5-6 minute, but soon got back to the 4-5 minute range. For some reason, I still didn't think this was real. I made dinner for me and Jeremy and cleaned up the house a bit.

I'm not real sure about any times for the rest of the day, night and following morning, since I wasn't really keeping track, but I think it was about 9pm when we called our doula, Coral to come over. She was here about an hour later and we talked a little bit about what was happening with my supposed labor. I remember sitting on the birthing ball and drinking a cup of red raspberry leaf tea, but I really don't remember very much detail of when things happened after that. I know that Coral told me to try and get some rest, so I went in the bedroom with Jeremy to lay down. I remember having four or five contractions while laying on my side and that was enough to get me out of bed – they were miserable. I still don't know what stage of labor that was – first stage, the end of first stage, moving into transition – but those contractions were awful. It is mainly because of those contractions that I cannot imagine having a natural birth in a hospital bed.

Coral did a vaginal exam at some point, I think it was around 10:30pm, and determined that we were still early on in the labor, since I was still only 1 ½ cm, but that she believed this was definitely the real thing. She wanted me to go on the bed and do a few minutes of knees-to-chest to try and get the baby to back out a little from his wedged position in my pelvis, as she believed he would have trouble descending from where he was. That was miserable, too, but I did it and I think it definitely helped things to move along.

Jan and her assistant Pam came over sometime just around midnight, and my friend Jason came over to get our dog Tommy shortly before that. I remember feeling really bad about all these people driving to our house because of me, since the night was particularly foggy. But again, I was still unsure whether or not I was really going to have a baby in the next few hours which, in retrospect, seems terribly short-minded. Jeremy and I spent a lot of time in our bedroom, working through the contractions while Jan, Coral and Pam worked on getting the tub filled. Jeremy was wonderful – he lit candles and had some of my favorite CDs ready to go should I want them. I appreciate everything he did for me throughout the labor but to be honest, once I was in it, I didn't really care what was going on around me. The candles were nice, but we never did turn the CD player on.

Eventually I was having contractions right on top of one another – transition. The funny thing is, there were a few where I had 5 or 6 minutes in between contractions, but then I would have 2 or 3 in a row – essentially non-stop. Because of the 5-6 minute lull between some of these, I started thinking (again) that maybe this wasn't really it. And like I said, I was in TRANSITION! I even said to Coral, “do you think I'm in transition?” She must have been laughing at me in her mind, since it was so obvious, but she was nice and answered me as if it was a totally reasonable question.

It was sometime shortly following this that I told Coral I felt the need to push. She ran to wake up Jan and Pam, who were attempting to get some sort of rest before they were needed. Jan did a vaginal exam only to discover that I was 8 ½ centimeters dilated and 100% effaced. Everyone was really happy with this – I was just surprised that I was REALLY going to have a baby! I was finally convinced. And it was time to get in the tub. I have to admit, the tub didn't feel like the instant relief I was expecting from what I had seen on baby shows and videos of natural waterbirths. But it did feel really nice, and I soon realized that it helped a great deal with the contractions.

As I said earlier, I have no concept of time regarding all of this, but I know from the little notes Jeremy was posting for the web-cam viewers that it was about 3:30am when I started pushing. I didn't like pushing. Not one bit. I'm not sure exactly what I was expecting pushing to feel like, but it didn't feel anything like what I thought it might feel like. In reality, to me, it felt like a really strong, unpleasant bowel movement. The actual act of pushing during a contraction was satisfying to a degree, but once I started I couldn't stop and the grunts and moans that came out of me actually scared me a bit, though not as much as the sensation that I was pushing my insides out along with the baby. I thought pushing would be the “easy” part, “easy” being a relative term in this case, but on the contrary, it was by far the hardest part of the labor for me, and I dreaded each contraction because I knew that I would have to push. There were some contractions during which I knew I could have pushed but resisted the urge, although I kept that to myself at the time. I didn't want anyone pressuring me to push. Sounds funny, I know, since this is childbirth. But I was just terrified of pushing.

At 4:35am my water broke. I remember feeling a “POP!” and I said, “...something just popped!” Jan (or Coral, or Pam, I'm not really sure) said, “Yep – that was your water breaking.” And with that, a huge clap of thunder outside and then an instant torrential downpour of heavy, heavy rain. For the record, that rain would last for approximately 4 days straight. The little man brought with him the wrath of god. I was happy to hear all this because I love thunderstorms, but I wasn't expecting it to last as long as it did or to bring the tornadoes and other dangerous weather that swept southeastern Wisconsin for the next four days. Still, I like to think that the thunder and the opening of the heavens was Mom-mom watching from above, where I know she is, making her presence known. After those four days of rain the rose bush we planted for her is thriving, with about two dozen buds ready to bloom into beautiful flowers.

After my water broke, it was another hour of pushing before the baby was out. I remember the delivery of the head and asking whether I tore. That was one of my big fears which, in retrospect, was kind of a silly fear. I didn't tear with the delivery of the head, but I did tear when his shoulders came out, and I didn't feel it at all (the tearing, that is).

I always thought that I'd cry once the baby was out and fall in love instantly. It wasn't really like that for me. I loved him, but moreso in the way I loved him while I was still pregnant. It wasn't that big of a moment for me -- it was more a relief that the pushing was over. Also, I think I had a really short umbilical cord, because I was sitting in the tub, holding the baby so that his body was in the warm water but his head was not in the water, and I could feel a slight tug on the cord, which was uncomfortable. So I guess I was a little distracted by that and the fact that my bottom just felt WRONG. I won't go into detail on how my bottom felt; I'll just leave it at that.

While I sat and looked at little JJ for the first few minutes of his life, Jan and Pam worked together to figure his Apgar scores at one minute and five minutes. I kept asking if he was ok because he didn't cry right away and his extremities were still kind of purple, even after a several minutes. Jan assured me he was fine, but I was convinced there was something she wasn't telling me. But there wasn't. He really was ok; it just took him a while to get his color. I mean, the poor kid was in the birth canal for two hours, so I guess it's to be expected that he'd look a little rough around the edges once he was out.

Next I moved to the couch where I laid the baby on my chest so we could have skin-to-skin contact. Eventually he started bobbing his head, looking for my breast -- it was amazing! I couldn't believe a little tiny infant, just minutes old, had that kind of strength, especially after the ordeal he'd been through. I had to help him find my nipple, but once he did I nursed him for a while (I'm not sure how long, since everything is kind of blurry in my memory). I delivered the placenta which was painless but gross-feeling, and then Jan assessed my perineum. I needed three stitches, which is really nothing, but it seemed to take forever for Jan to finish them. I just wanted to be done with everything so I could just lay with the baby and not be poked or prodded anymore. Still I'm sure this part of the process would have been more irritating in the hospital, since Jan was so patient with the delivery of the placenta and everything else involved with my immediate post-natal care.

I talked on the phone with several people around this time. I'm not sure if people were calling or if Jeremy called some people to tell them the news, but I felt like I was constantly on the phone. I didn't mind so much, though, since I knew I wouldn't be seeing any of those people for quite some time and I wanted to share the moment with them. But I remember being really uncomfortable on the couch and holding the phone was just making me more uncomfortable. But soon enough I was off the couch and after using the bathroom (FINALLY) I was cleaned up and ready to spend some time resting. Of course I couldn't sleep that whole first day because I had such an adrenaline rush, but I rested in the bed with the baby, and Jeremy took care of everything I needed. Oh! And I almost forgot... at about 7am (an hour and a half after JJ was born) our plumber was scheduled to come with the City of Greenfield inspector to get the rough plumbing approved on our upstairs remodeling project. We never canceled the appointment since we weren't sure the night before whether or not I was actually going to have the baby. So we just let them come and do the inspection. They never even realized that I had just had a baby in the living room less than two hours earlier. Good thing we didn't have a hospital birth or we would have had to reschedule the inspector, which is no small feat.

I guess that's really where the birth story ends, but really it was just the beginning of all the wonderful things to come. There were a some drastic ups and downs the first couple of weeks and now there are less severe ups and downs, but overall being a mother has been wonderful. JJ is beautiful, and I love him more than I knew I was capable of loving anything or anyone.

A Few Good Days - July 24th

2008-07-24T12:49:00.012-05:00

So I know this is in stark contrast to my last post, but the last few nights have been wonderful. Consequently, the last few days have also been wonderful. JJ seems to have his days and nights straightened out, but I hesitate to say that too loudly because it seems like every time I say something has gotten better, it gets worse again.

In any case, for three nights in a row now I've gotten a really good night's sleep. And I think JJ's happier for it, too. He hasn't been fussing as much at night, which means he's been more comfortable/happy at night. I've been giving him Mylicon after each feeding, and I think that's been helping with the uncomfortable gas he's had.

I'm starting to really get the hang of this full-time mom thing. I don't really understand those people who say that they're bored staying home full-time or those people who say they feel like they never get anything done. Yesterday I did three loads of laundry, cleaned the kitchen, took the baby to meet some old work friends, stopped at Babies R Us for some pajamas for the little guy, cleaned up the bedroom and even managed to take a shower and do my makeup. I think that's quite a bit to get done in a day, especially considering that I also did the everyday tasks of feeding the baby every few hours, feeding myself once in a while, taking care of our dog and two cats, and changing lots of diapers. I feel a huge sense of accomplishment, even if I'll have to do it all again tomorrow. How anyone could be bored or feel unaccomplished is beyond me. Different strokes...

Anyway, back to the focus of my days: JJ's seven weeks old today, and he's getting STRONG! Just look at his neck and back muscles in action here! He'll be crawling before we know it! And he is the cutest thing, if I do say so myself. For the record, his shirt has a cartoon drawing of the earth and says "Hi. I'm new here." One of these days I'm going to take pictures of him in all his cute onsies. We have so many I don't know if he'll get to wear them all otherwise, not to mention that we don't have many friends and family nearby, so we never get to show him off in his cute clothes. I'll have to start using those pics in my posts from now on...

No Rest for the Weary - July 21st

2008-07-21T05:24:00.004-05:00

It's 5:29 am and I'm here creating a new post because I've been awake for the last three hours and don't know what to do with myself. I got up at 2:30 am to feed JJ and instead of going back to sleep after that like he usually does, he decided to stay up and fuss for three hours. Eventually he was hungry again and this time he did fall asleep after eating, but I've been awake for so long I'm not sure I can go back to sleep now. And to top it all off, a mosquito just bit me on the forehead. Can't a girl get a break?

Nights like tonight make me understand why some people can lose their temper with an infant. They seem so amazing and adorable when you look at them and think about how helpless and innocent they are, but then you spend a night trying (unsuccessfully) to cater to their needs and you quickly realize that you have become a slave to their every whim. It's frustrating and quite frankly, infuriating that this little creature can have that much control over me. I've had the urge to "shake" him quite a few times now, but I've always had enough sense to leave the room and cool off. I'm not justifying the terrible things that some people do to their beautiful little babies, but like I said, I understand how a person could lose control under the circumstances. Between the sleep deprivation and the baby's incessant crying, after endless attempts at quieting the little dear, one can not be expected to be sane.

So now I'm faced yet again with a difficult choice. Do I force myself to fall back asleep with the extremely high likelihood that it will only result in approximately 1 solid hour of sleep, but with the chance that I could get a coveted two hours or more, or do I stay awake and do the things I enjoy doing while I have a chance, even if it means I'll be a zombie for the rest of the day? I know I should try to go back to sleep, but I'm so sick of having no control over when I sleep and for how long, not to mention what I can do with my time when I'm awake. I'm much like a rebellious teenager, doing what I want in spite of the things I can't control; but ultimately I'm only going to make things worse for myself. Of course, now I've wasted about a half hour of potential sleep since JJ's been snoozing for that long and I've been here ranting and venting. But really, what is another half hour or hour or two hours of sleep really going to do for me at this point? Besides, I can sleep when I'm dead.

Pictures of JJ

2008-07-20T19:42:00.002-05:00

JJ's Birth Day - June 5, 2008

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I found out I was pregnant back in October, and right away we started planning our homebirth. My due date was June 13th according to my OB/GYN (Friday the 13th!) and June 14th according to my midwife. JJ didn't like those numbers; he decided to come on June 5th instead. If you want the story from my perspective, which was somewhat warped since I was in labor, you can read my birth story. Otherwise, here are all the details you could possibly want, and then some:

Name: Jeremy Allen Hansen, Jr.
Date of Birth: 6/5/08
Time: 5:24 am
Place: Living Room
Weight: 7 lbs 7 oz
Length: 20.5 inches
Head circumference 34 cm
Chest circumference 35.5 cm
Gestational Age by Dates: 38 weeks +5 days
Gestational Age by Clinical Exam: 38.5 weeks
Apgar score at 1 minute: 7
Apgar score at 5 minutes: 8
Baby's presentation: vertex
Delivery position: hands & knees (waterbirth!)

Early Labor began on 6/4/08 at 9:30 am
Midwife arrived on 6/5/08 at 12:00 am
Active Labor began on 6/5/08 at 1:15 am
Second Stage began on 6/5/08 at 3:40 am
Rupture of Membranes on 6/5/08 at 4:34 am
Birth of Placenta at 5:41 am
First Nursing at 6:55 am